Tuesday 7 July 2009

Further Toy Testing Techniques

The secret to destroying any toy quickly is to concentrate on one area only. Continued knawing, pulling and plenty drool for softening the targetted area. A constant and ongoing nibble should produce the desired damage in the shortest time. This results in inferior toys being removed and better, more expensive ones arriving in their place.

Tip: if the material of the toys is too tough even for drool, leave them in unseen places, around corners, just outside doors, etc to allow giants to soften the material by standing on them. If you're sleeping, you can be alerted to the successful mission if the toy has a built-in squeaker, doubling as an alarm clock for those sleepier puppies amongst us.

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