Sweary signs about stones

You know I like sticks and wrapping the magic rope around things, so imagine my joy when I was taken to a forest path for a walk today!?

I weaved in and out of tall trees, baby trees, dead trees, bushes, even managed to drag Furry-face through a spiky bush, but then the magic rope stopped working and I was confined to the main path for some reason?

I discovered some little things that grow on and around trees in a forest, they're called 'ferns' and are very sociable as they have lots of 'friends' or something. They are highly recommended by cats, and I can see why. They have a light, fluffy texture with a strong flavour and a fragrant aroma, making them easy to find. Only problem is they get stuck in my chops, so they hang out the side of my mouth as evidence of snacking.

We passed a sign that Chewy read out to me, I think the sign writer feels really strongly about these stones, maybe they've lost patience from so many persons doing it? I think 'prosecuted' is like 'electrocuted' but done more professionally?! But it does say 'persons', so I should be okay to chomp on a few stones, I'm a beagle!

a spot of gardening

not so long ago, I discovered the sneaky tricks gardeners use to keep their plants safe. Nets, fences, large invisible forcefields, and even making plants live on top of walls. Now, my wee leggies can't get me up to these walled gardens yet, but my cunning has won the day again.

The distraction technique, if timed properly, should catch out even the most experienced and knowledgeable dognapper! The coat gets put on, the treats placed in pocket, leash gets picked up, "sit", door unlocked, handle pulled down, pee now! During the long walk to the food preparation room, squeeze a paw in the gap the door has. Free! Well, into the front garden at least!

But what to snack on? So much choice - grass, heather, weeds, leaves, petals, more weeds… and roses. Quite a challenge these roses! My first bounce through the garden a few days ago, I found the clever defences of these roses. They fired a triangular pointy bit of wood into my paw pads. Furry-face had to remove it as I couldn't walk without it getting pushed further in. But today, I was ready, I snuck up on them from behind, snapping off their arms between the defences, chomping away to remove their skin, the leaves and petals are quite tasty!

Once the pee was neutralised, my rose attacking was foiled, head down, tromp back through the leaves, sad, sorrowful eyes set to maximum!

Eating Them out of House and Home

Occasionally, I'm left to roam the enclosed rear yard at HQ by myself, this has come in handy in the past for finding catfood lying around unattended.

I've tried out the various attractions, the weeds, the stones, I really like ferns and plastic plant pots, but I've discovered I have access to something tastier than stones - the building!

I found a small crack in the render along the bottom of the wall, if I nudge it hard enough and repeatedly, I can knock bits of the building off to chew on. MUCH tastier than big stones, kind of a woody, brick-like flavour, with a sandy texture. It's especially good followed by a rain-bucket drink. Quite the picnic-at-home.