Tess on Telly

I was just settling down on for a snooze on Furry-face when something in the prison portal caught my eye - it was my mate Tess! I sat and watched as she was forced to do some kind of food promotion, and it's not even for a food she eats!? Certain ways she sat, it didn't really look like her? I barked at her a few times during her performance, but either she couldn't hear me or it was an impostor!? She had managed to catch one of those pesky cats in a cage behind her, impressive!

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Chewy didn't know she was in there either, she was surprised and exclaimed "Tess is famous, she's on the telly!" Now that just reassures me that it's Furry-face that's capturing all these prisoners. I wish I knew where he kept the key though!

Ola Day

Both Chewy and Furry-face ran away today, they mentioned something about an "Ola Day"? My hard work recognised at last, a short break for beagles perhaps?

My stand-in captor has read her mission instructions, luckily, I read them first. Full advantage will be taken of "don't let him help clean up after a pee or poo, make sure he can't see you". The quick-pee distraction technique should fix that - a small pee at one end of the great hall, followed by a brisk trot to nibble on whatever bag has been left at my level.

The technique works perfectly, so well, in fact, that I managed to keep her so busy I couuld sneak into the back garden, right in to the cat-house-rabbit-house (wasn't that a Tina Turner lyric?). My timing was perfect, there must be an automatic sensor that opens the food container, the second I approached, it sprung open, a full tray of catfood! Mmmm - Cod & Plaice!

Why does this catfood taste SO much better than my rabbity-chickeny stuff?

It's Careless to Burn an Island

Today we visited the island that got burnt, I mean, how careless are these giants? I thought they were over reacting again, but, sure enough, theyre still at it. Evidence all along the cliff path that they still burn it today.

Someone kept blowing in my face whilst we were on the cliffs. I couldn't see who, every time I turned around, they'd gone?! I don't like it, I try to catch the air with my teeth before it hits my nose, but it's tricky.

We met a few other dogs, they didn't like me much, even rolling on my back whilst howling didn't win them over. Then we went on a completely wasted trip to see the Kings Horn, no sign anywhere, so I got dragged to Petty Curse Bay. On the way there, the tank windows were down, and Chewy was shouting at a man we passed, he had a smelly bum apparently? I was too busy listening our for those funny popping noises behind me again!

Once we arrived, there were more cats to chase, lots of fishy smells and I discovered this stuff called 'sand'. It's great, really chewy and has lots of funny stones in it, they're shells apparently?! I don't have the time to sit and wait for a stone to hatch out of its shell, but it only seems to happen at beaches, they must need the salted water or something? Anyway, sand tastes great, so does the 'sea wee' it has in it. There was a small sealskinned thing playing with a toy in the water, iy was getting blown away by the mysterious face-blower, he was being dragged for miles. Furry-face and Chewy said they wanted to scream, I couldn't be bothered, it was time for my nap!